Rule #1. Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teenager uses the phrase "it's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule #1.
Rule #2. The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as your school does. It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain that it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1)
Rule #3. Sorry, you won't make $50,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label.
Rule #4. If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'til you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he is not going ask you how feel about it.
Rule #5. Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Edward Cullen all weekend.
Rule #6. It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it or you'll sound like a Gen Xer.
Rule #7. Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation try delousing the closet in your bedroom.
Rule #8. Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off. Nor even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on.
Rule #9. Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the sandwich shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be perky or as polite as Selena Gomez.
Rule #10. Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.
Rule #11. Enjoy this while you can. Sure, parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be kid. Maybe you should start now.
Rule #2. The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as your school does. It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain that it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1)
Rule #3. Sorry, you won't make $50,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label.
Rule #4. If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'til you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he is not going ask you how feel about it.
Rule #5. Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Edward Cullen all weekend.
Rule #6. It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it or you'll sound like a Gen Xer.
Rule #7. Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation try delousing the closet in your bedroom.
Rule #8. Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off. Nor even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on.
Rule #9. Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the sandwich shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be perky or as polite as Selena Gomez.
Rule #10. Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.
Rule #11. Enjoy this while you can. Sure, parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be kid. Maybe you should start now.
33 comments:
Bravo!
That all is the very true and we should teach our kids how tough the life really is.
Really well written, true to the T, practical post. Loved every word of it. I have a blog where I share interesting things I find online amongst other content which I create. I'd really appreciate if you give me the permission to copy this same post on my blog.
Please don't hesitate because I intend to give you 100% credit with a trackback. I wouldn't be plagiarizing. Looking forward to a hopefully positive response.
Thanks in advance.
Or, since life OBVIOUSLY sucks so bad and you have it so good now, kill yourself and get ahead, who wants the contempt of these old folks anyways
So basically, as soon as you graduate high-school, hang yourself...
Wow this person depressed me... from personal experience, more than half of what they said is untrue.
this reeks of agism, such bantering against the supposed ills of the younger generations has been going on since the time of Plato. The fact that we find those younger than us stupidly naive is more a representation of our own jealousy that our own lives will never again achieve their youthful optimism that we have lost at old age.
O well, at least we let these kids drink a beer legally at 20 to cool of the steam of paying for our social security am I right?
Do you think kids these days know much about plagiarism?
Rule #3...wtf is a car phone?
Every first grader needs to learn these.
Benjamin Koshkin
It was called 'opportunity' because our parents actually had a currency worth working at minimum wage for. Working 20 hours at a burger station for $7.50/hr won't pay rent in a cheap place anymore, let alone gasoline for the car and the insurance to drive it. And food, don't forget about that.
pure awesomeness
These lessons prepare kids for a life of mediocrity. Ever heard of lifestyle design? Check it out and you'll see what I mean
1. This is something I expect my mother and her coworkers to forward around the office as some sort of feel-good-about-yourself-and-your-trivial-job exercise. It's not funny, and most people my age will agree.
2. The list really pushes the "work, consume, die" mentality that we have become fortunate enough to realize and that we now strive to reject.
3. The list assumes that hard work early in life will be rewarded with an 8-hour work day with a terrible boss. Sorry Mom and Dad, we're a generation of college students. We have the opportunity to pursue careers that we won't hate.
4. The glorification of parents and grandparents-- no offense to any individual grandparents or parents, but the Baby boomer generation has successfully bankrupted our country while simultaneously creating benefits such as medicare and social security for themselves. Sure, they seem great, but their sense of self-entitlement makes the normal, juvenile sense of self-entitlement seem quite small. Perhaps they themselves never grew out of it.
Bill Gates rip off
some of this is taken from a bill gates speech to graduates
Um... car phones and Gap shirts? This would be cuter if it was a bit more updated.
#8 is partly true because if youre a teacher then you do have summers off and all the other holiday
Haha, a car phone? You also probably can't expect to have a Walkman or three-way calling. If you're lucky your salary will be sufficient enough to get an 8-track and one of those new VHS player things.
What Bill Gates originaly said was not agist. But, this guy's ripped it off him and for good measure added in that all teenagers think they're fantastic and think everythings unfair.
We don't, there's a huge amount of teenagers with self esteem issues, I would say it's a better stereotype to say that teenagers feel crap about themselves.
But hey what do I know, I'm a teenager so all I think about is myself. Seriously, it's not so fun. We can barely walk down the street after 9 without getting dodgy looks, even if we are by ourself. And god forbid we wear a hood, nevermind it's raining we're probably planning to mug you. I've had people cross the street because I was wearing my hood... It was RAINING. That's what hoods are for.
Seriously? I don't know why baby boomers feel like they have to be so negative towards Gen Y. I know a lot of hard working, optimistic, practical young people who aren't as lazy or worthless as people like you like to pretend they are. My generation faces a LOT of obstacles, just as many as yours... not the least of which will be paying for your Medicare and Social Security. You're welcome.
Hmmm... I've rarely met a teenager who thinks a minumum wage job is beneath them; most seem to be grateful to have one in the first place - more than can be said for a lot of them older folks. Also, I like that we should be nice to "nerds" because it may someday work out to our advantage, rather than simply for the fact that they're people. Good work...
The billionth rehash of "Kids today..." Basic economics and sociology show the real challenges facing this generation, and they aren't on this list. The loss of the American manufacturing sector, depressed wages, inflated health care transportation tuition and housing costs, the loss of community based social groups, fragmentation, our highest levels of alienation... just to get started. Never mind trying to pay for the baby boomers' social security, medicare and war debt.
To anyone that really wants to help this generation along, work with them and be a teacher, mentor, friend, or tutor.
Got it.
Kids these days grow up to say kids these days.
move along
Baby boomers sat around talking about James Dean and Johnnie Ray all weekend. Follow this advice and live a life void of dignity and self-determination. I'm 25 and work as a barista (just about the same as flipping burgers) and I assure you my job is worthy of thumbing nose at as it would take 19 years with no holidays to save up enough money for a deposit on the cheapest of houses in a city in Australia. Most of my ingrate young friends worked two jobs and starved to get through university. Put that in your pipe and smoke it self-righteous old coot.
Still the redeeming aspect of these rules are that it's funny to watch other people flounder and drown in the angry ocean that is life. 10 points.
@ Rule #8
If you think that's what life is, then frankly, that's your fault. If you don't like it, change how you work, where you work, why you work etc.
Life doesn't have to be 9-5 and boring. It can be vibrant and amazing, and involve doing things you love. Teaching kids to expect 9-5, 5 days a week is as bad as teaching them that they'll never amount to anything. Sure they may not be rocket scientists, but teach them first that their life is what they make it, not that being sub par and like everyone else is acceptable.
If you feel like you have to tell kids that all of these things are going to suck for them, then perhaps you yourself didn't do enough to make your life what you wanted it to be.
Also I realise this post was more of a joke than a serious list, but I couldn't help but have an opinion anyway.
A car phone?! How old is this list?
Funny, a lot of those rules don't apply to me because I am a teacher.
Life is divided into semesters, and I DO get semesters off! Yay!
You should give credit to Bill Gates as this is from his book.
RULE 1
Life is not fair - get used to it.
RULE 2
The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world
will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel
good about yourself.
RULE 3
You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out
of high school. You won't be a vice president with
car phone, until you earn both.
RULE 4
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a
boss. He doesn't have tenure.
RULE 5
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your
grandparents had a different word for burger flipping
they
called it Opportunity.
RULE 6
If you mess up,it's not your parents' fault, so don't
whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
RULE 7
Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as
they are now. They got that way from paying your bills,
cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about
how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest
from the parasites of your parent's generation, try
delousing the closet in your own room.
RULE 8
Your school may have done away with winners and losers,
but life has not. In some schools they have abolished
failing grades and they'll give you as many times as
you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the
slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
RULE 9
Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get
summers off and very few employers are interested in
helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.
RULE 10
Television is NOT real life. In real life people
actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
RULE 11
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for
one.
This is from a Bill Gates Speech and he got it from a Charles Sykes book...
I thought this was cool until I read the comments. You guys are right. Our generation was taught "play by the rules" to get ahead. Well, look who makes the rules. The rich guys who need minimum wage slaves to run their empires. Screw the rules and go out and fight for what matters and enjoy your lives.
You forgot to mention that this list is for the "average" person. A wealthy teenager would have half of these problems. Life IS fair for them.
Accer:
Working 20 hours @ 7.50 won't pay the rent. Then try working 40 a week instead. That's 160hrs. Guess step 2 is learning to budget. AAAGGGGHHH give up all my time txtng and answering emails...WORK thats a four letter word.
stop it's embarrassing.
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